Sunshine! Storm!!! Rainbow????

I love when I put "Seth Josiah Schamburg" on google it's everything about Seth. Even the picture of his name in the sand. I love seeing that knowing that even though Seth isn't here he is still here even though he isn't. I find a little bit of peace knowing his name on google then I see Seth sweet name I love so much. It's weird how on google you can search anything and you will find what you are looking for. I have been talking to mom about "what if" she had another baby. Would she want another baby? Can she have another baby? Are people going to say "oh your having a baby after you last one was dead" better jot say anything. Nothing at all or I will be very mad at some people even more so if its family. Some people or should I say person who shall not be named would make it seem like mom would die if she has another baby. But no she wouldn't she talked to her doctor when she was pregnant with Seth and the Dr. Said "are you going to have anymore kids because your so healthy" but some people will think your goons kill this baby to. But she wouldn't we found out it was nothing that mom did Seth just went to sleep and didn't wake up. I would love if my mom had another baby 'a girl?' then I would love on that baby forever. It would never take Seth's place but it would put a "band aid" on our hearts. Would hold our hearts together until we can stand the pain. On lady told mom when you have kids they all have 'names' if you have other children before a loss then they are called 'sunshine babies' and then when you lose a baby then it's called 'a storm' and then if you do or can have another baby then the baby is called 'rainbow baby' I want my mom to have a rainbow baby. I want a baby in our house. I want to pick up a baby and hold it when it starts to cry, kiss on it, and love it so much. I don't think anyone would know how much love I would have for another baby I would most like never share this baby with anyone *NOTE: THIS DOES NOT MEAN THAT MY MOM IS PREGNANT AS OF RIGHT NOW!!!* doesn't mean never but doesn't mean now. I just wanted to make that clear. But might I say I would love right a blog saying that she was. If only she were. Maybe one day months from know maybe she will be having her/our rainbow baby. Who knows.